Say It
by MarlyCook
Summary: Okay so I decided not to make it a one shot. So this is an AU future fic, when Jess tells Rory he did something terrible. What will happen? Will their marriage fail? Or can they keep together?
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but the story plot.**

**A/N: This is just another idea that popped into my head while watching very sad youtube videos that popcan11 and shelmayshasta made. I say sad, but not only were they sad, but they were amazing. They have a gift. Haha, okay well enough about me bragging on them. I know I have some stories that are not yet finished, but I promise ALL of my stories will be finished. Well on with this story that is a future fic. And obviously an AU cause it's Lit, and I know they will probably never be together again, sadly. **

Jess' POV

I didn't know what to do. I could just watch her cry, and watch her shake furiously. She won't even look up at me, and I don't blame her. I looked down at my shoes for what seemed like an eternity before I heard her speak. It was a small whisper, and what came out sounded so horrible to my ears.

"How long?" She whispered softly, looking down at the hem of her skirt.

I swallowed hard trying to push back the lump that was stuck in my throat, "It was only one night."

She lets out a little noise, that I could tell was a cry, "Was she better?"

I let out a heavy breath, and made my way over to the bed, "No. No, she wasn't even close to being better than you. It was meaningless."

She shook her head, pushing on my shoulder when I kneeled to be eye to eye with her, "No… don't come close to me. Every time you do you hurt me more."

I felt the sharp pang in my chest where my heart is supposed to be and even though it was against her wishes I reached forward and put a strand of hair behind her ear, "Rory… I love you. I'm sorry."

She grips the sheets and turns her head away from my touch, "Why?" It came out weak and followed by a burst of tears.

I drop my hand to my side, and watch as tear fall off of her face and into her lap, "Rory, I don't know. I was drunk and upset because of our fight, and she was there."

Rory moved her hands to her face and covered her eyes, "Stop! Just stop! Stop telling me about it, and about her! I didn't want to know!"

I put a hand on her knee, "Rory... I had to tell you."

Rory stood up and walked to the bathroom, slamming the door.

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She'd been in the bathroom for half an hour. I was worried, but I didn't dare go knock on that door. I had messed up, I had done the worst thing. I turned into Logan. I cheated on the woman I am deeply and truly in love with. I know it was an accident and it meant nothing in fact I stopped it before we got to the bed, but it was still cheating. I rolled over in the bed and turned my lamp off, at least she didn't kick me out. Maybe there's still hope. I'd give anything for her to tell me she loved me right now. Anything in the world.

She comes out of the bathroom dressed into my Metallica t-shirt and my boxers; I can't help but smile weakly at the sight of her in my clothes. It's perfect on her.

She lays down in the bed and pulls the covers up to her chin. I wish she'd say something, I wish she'd tell me she still loved me.

Say it.

Say it.

"Jess?" It comes out so tiny, but it makes me jump on the inside.

"Yeah Ror?" I don't look at her but I take a deep breath.

Say it.

Say it.

"I'm cold.." I sigh and get out of bed. I walk over to the thermostat and turn it up. When I turn back she's rolled over with her eyes closed.

I wish she would have just said it.

**A/N: I might continues this if I get positive reviews, or I might leave it a one shot. **


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: I own my imagination.**

**A/N: I decided to make it a story instead of a one shot because I got good reviews. Some people said it worked good as a one shot, but the majority said to continue. So here I am… continuing.**

He walks over and climbs into the bed. He watches her steady breathing, and scoots closer to her. He contemplates on whether to put an arm around her or not, and he decides against it. It takes everything to keep him from touching her, or from saying anything. He wants to reach out to her, but he just keeps his hands tucked behind his head.

The clock on the wall is the only noise throughout the room. Jess had fallen asleep an hour ago, and everything was peaceful. There was a rustling in the bed, as Rory moves waking up. She sits up and looks over at Jess. Then thoughts from the previous night entered her mind, flowing back like a brain freeze. She shakes her thought and sighs brushing the bangs out of his eyes, "I do love you." She whispers, "I'm just afraid to trust you." She kissed his forehead softly and got out of the bed.

Two hours later Jess woke up to the sound of the shower running. He sat up and rubbed his face, then ran his hand through his hair. Jess swung his legs over the left side of the bed and stood up. He walked into his closet and grabbed something to wear for the day. Standing beside the bathroom door, he waited for Rory to get out.

Rory opened the door and looks up at him, "It's all yours." She walked past him and to her dresser. He sighed and walked into the bathroom, closing the door and getting into the shower.

She walked into the bathroom, while he was still showering and did her makeup. She never does it too heavy because then she would look like one of those two dollar hookers. Or at least that is how Lorelai so delicately put it. The shower water went off and Rory left the bathroom.

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Jess walked out into the kitchen and grabbed an apple from the bowl in the middle of the counter. Rory grabbed her briefcase off of the floor and walked towards the door, "I'll be home early tonight. I don't have a lot to do today."

Her voice sounded distant and cold. Not like it used to be. Usually when she spoke to him she seemed happy and was smiling. Jess nodded, "Okay. I'll be home whenever. I don't have any idea of what is going on today."

Rory takes a deep breath, "Well, bye Jess." She walks out the door. Jess hangs his head, and sighs. What happened to when she said 'I love you' and kissed him before she left? He grabbed his keys and walked out the door. This was going to be a long day.

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The next day he got home early and walked into the house, "Rory? Ror? Are you home yet?" Jess called into the empty house. He looked at the clock that read 4:18 P.M. When he realized Rory wasn't home yet he made his way to the kitchen and began cooking. She was going to be home early again tonight so he would surprise her with something to eat. Today was their anniversary.

He called her office and waited for her to pick up.

"New York Times this is Rory Mariano speaking."

"Hey Rory, it's Jess. Are you coming home early tonight?"

Rory shuffles the papers on her desk, "Yeah. I'll be home in about an hour."

Jess smiles, "Okay, then. I'll see you later."

Rory nods, "Okay. Bye." She hangs up the phone before he says anything else, and goes back to working.

Jess was going to go all out for tonight, he was never into the romantic thing, but tonight was going to be perfect for her. He lined rose petals from the door to the dining room. Or the little one they had. He turned off the lights and lit a few candles, and put a card on the counter for right when she walked in. Jess put all of the food he fixed on the table, and sat down.

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Rory walked through the door and threw her keys on the counter. She looked over at the sink where Jess was washing the plates. He didn't even turn to look at her. Rory picked up the card on the table and read it to herself.

_Happy Anniversary, Rory._

_I can't tell you how sorry I am for what happened, and hope you can forgive me. Tonight I just want it to be you and me enjoying our anniversary. Follow the rose petals._

_I love you,_

_Jess_

The water turned off and Jess brushed by her and walked back into the dining room. He blew out all of the candles.

Rory walked in and over to him, "Jess?"

He shook his head, "It's 11:00, Rory. I have been waiting on you since 8. You said you would be home early."

"I'm so sorry, Jess, I didn't think I would be out so late. Logan made do another check on the computer for him." She could see the hurt in his eyes so she moved forward and placed a hand on his shoulder.

Jess shrugged her off and walked to their bedroom, "There's leftovers in the fridge. Happy Anniversary." He slammed the door, and got into bed.

She watched him go, and suddenly felt horrible. Today was their anniversary, wasn't it? Rory put her purse on the stool and slowly walked into their bedroom.

The dresser slammed shut and Jess threw on a white undershirt, he climbed in bed and rolled onto his right side. Rory walked over to the bed and slipped off her shoes before the other remaining clothes. Then she put on a pair of her night pants and got into bed.

He felt her get in, but he didn't budge. He wasn't going to lie, he was angry. She couldn't come home because Logan, out of all people, asked her to do something. He knew when she took the job at the New York Times she would have to see him a lot, but this was just unbelievable. It was their anniversary!

Swallowing hard, she wrapped an arm around his waist and kissed his shoulder, "Jess, I am so sorry, okay? I really am."

He doesn't move. He just closes his eyes, and pretends he is sleeping. She sighs heavily and rolls over on her back. It took her hours before she could sleep.


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: I do not own anything, except a few of Jess and Rory's co-workers or friends.**

**A/N: Thank you for my feedback! I love getting reviews, sometimes I think I write more so I can more reviews. Well here is the next chapter. Enjoy!**

Rory woke up and rolled over expecting to be cuddled into the side of Jess. Instead she felt cold crumpled sheets. She opened her eyes and sat up looking around the room. When she stopped to listen she heard the shower running and got out of bed.

After stepping out of her clothes she pushes the shower curtain aside and steps in. Jess turns around, "Hey."

"Hey." Rory grabs the shampoo and scrubs her hair, "Look, Jess, I'm sorry. I know I shouldn't have made you wait so late. But Jess, you really shouldn't be angry at me."

Jess scoffed, "You're kidding me, right?" He shook his head and turned back around to face the wall.

She grabbed his shoulder and turned him around forcefully, "No! You should not even be this mad at me! At least I didn't cheat on you!" She shoved him back against the shower wall.

"I told you I was sorry, Rory!" He stepped forward, in the fighting mode just like her.

"Sorry doesn't always cut it." Rory rinsed out her hair and got out of the shower. Grabbing a towel from the shelf to wrap around her, she walked to the sink and wiped the condensation off of the mirror.

The shower cut off and Jess stepped out after her, wrapping the towel around his waist, "Rory, you were alone in an office with your ex-boyfriend who you were going to marry at one time. How do I know you weren't just going to get back at me?"

Rory turned and stared him down, anger flashed in her eyes, "Because unlike you, I can be trusted." She said calmly, and then walked out of the bathroom and to her dresser.

He shook out his hair the best that he could and walked out to her, "Rory… I… I didn't mean it… I was… I was just talking before I thought."

"Well you obviously thought that!" She turned to him and the tears were falling again, he hated this. The hurt. Every time she cried it hurt him worse than before. She wiped her eyes, "I… thought… you… loved…me." She choked out her words in between sobs.

"I do Rory! I do! You're my wife, I proposed… I married you! Of course I love you!"

She wouldn't say anything for the longest time. She looked down at the soft carpet and fixed her eyes on one particular spot. The stain she had made when she spilt the coffee, trying to serve breakfast in bed to Jess on his birthday three months ago. She finally looked up at him. Her eyes were so watery. She blinked. So many tear drops fell, "You were with another woman, Jess. I always told my self that I wouldn't be the girl who let her husband cheat on her. I thought with you that I was safe. I thought that with you I would never have to worry about other women. I want Jess back."

"He's still here." Jess sat at the end of the bed.

"No. I want the Jess that proposed to me. I want the Jess that fought for me. The Jess that said 'Till death do us part.' I want the Jess who comforted me when we had our first and second miscarriage. Why can't I have him back?" Rory slammed her fist against the dresser top.

"Rory! That Jess is still here! People mess up… they make mistakes." He raked his hand through his hair and looked down at his bare feet.

"Yeah, I know people make mistakes. But what was that one thing you said to me when we first got together? After I told you about all the times Logan had flings on the side? I believe you said 'I would never do that to you, Ror. I love you, and with me you don't have to worry about being hurt.'" Rory turned to look at him, her tears were becoming uncontrollable, "I believed you!"

"And you should have! It's the truth Rory! I didn't want to hurt you… it was all a big mistake!" Jess stood up and walked towards her.

"No! No, no, no! Stop!" She put her hands over her ears and closed her eyes, "I am not hearing this again! This is what Logan always said!"

"Don't compare me to him! I am not Logan, Rory. I wouldn't do this over and over and say it was a mistake. I take it back and if I could do it over I would have never let her buy me a drink." Jess stood at least a foot away from her.

"Stop it!" She screamed holding her ears tighter, "Just stop saying 'her'! I hate her!"

Jess just looked down at the floor and listened to her sobbing, "Rory… I'm sorry." He whispered.

"I want to trust you again."

Jess looked up at her as she continued, "I'm going to stay with my mom this week. I want to sort everything out. I might be gone for a few days or maybe longer. We need time. I am not going to divorce over this. I just need to get away."

He nodded, slowly. After he swallowed hard he spoke, "When are you leaving?"

"After I get dressed and packed." She folded her arms across her chest.

"I have to go to the office and get some of the paperwork that Evan couldn't fill out. I'll be back in about an hour or so. Will you still be here?" He looked hopeful. It was like he was trying to get her to date him for the first time.

"I don't know. Maybe." She shrugged and picked out clothes from the dresser in front of her.

Jess walked to his closet after staring at her back for the longest time. This was hard. He loved her too much to see her this angry.

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Jess walked into the office and went to his desk. It wasn't as crazy around here as it usually was so he probably couldn't sneak by like he usually does. He grabbed the yellow folder that contained the papers he needed to tend to and he walked out of his office, locking the door in the process.

Once he stepped out Evan stood right there. Jess jumped a little and breathed in heavily, "Jeez, you scared the shit out of me."

"Sorry man. So… where have you been? I called early this morning. You said you would take a 'quick' shower and be down here."

Jess ran a hand through his hair, "Sorry, I had a fight with Rory. It stalled me."

"Another fight? Jeez, you could break me and Sonya's record and no one can do that." Evan laughed a little.

Jess didn't even crack a smile. It wasn't that the comment made him mad, it was just so true. He nodded, "Yeah… it was about the accident. Again."

"I told you not to tell her. But no, you insisted. Does she know who it is, yet?" Evan wondered.

"No!" Jess snapped and looked around the office, "No, no, no."

"I take that as a no." Evan smirked, "Look man, you need to tell her."

Jess shook his head, "No, what difference would it make anyway? She's gone, now. She moved cities."

"That doesn't matter. It doesn't matter if the girl lives 400 miles away. Rory should still know." Evan had on a serious face.

"I can't." Jess' eyes were actually watering. No one besides Luke and Rory had seen him cry. Aside from Liz who saw him cry when he was young and scraped his knee on the sidewalk.

Evan nodded, "You will one day, though, right?"

"One day." Jess nodded and walked past him, "I'll see you Monday."

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Jess got home and walked into the bedroom. Rory's car was still parked outside, so this was a good sign. He saw her suitcase lying open on the bed with clothes and essentials packed up high.

She walked out of the bathroom and set her toothbrush on top, "Hey. I decided not to leave, yet."

"Good. But you are leaving soon?" Jess tilted his head to the side.

"Don't sound so excited to get rid of me." She showed a hint of a smile and zipped up her suitcase, "I guess I better get going."

Jess lifted her suitcase off the bed and set it on the ground, "Okay… I guess I'll see you in a few days."

Rory nodded and grabbed the handle, "Yeah. Mom said she needed me, so at least I won't be intruding."

Jess shrugged, "Yeah.. And she's your mom. She always loves your company. So… does she know?"

Rory shook her head, "No, but she most likely will. I mean I have to tell her why we are taking time apart."

He sighed, "Can you not say it like that?"

"Why not? It's what we are doing."

"When you say it like that it sounds more like we are about to break up or something." Jess shoves his hands in his pockets.

"Oh." She nodded and sighed heavily, "Well, I'm going to go. Bye." She turned on her heel and walked towards the door.

"Bye Ror." He leaned on the door frame and watched her walk out.

After she stepped out of the door she stopped and turned back around. She opened the door and walked back in the house. Jess heard her coming and turned around, "Did you forget som-"

He was cut off by her lips crashing on his. It had been days since they had physical contact. Jess pulled her closer as the goodbye kiss turned into a passionate heated kiss. Her hands ran through his messy hair and his hand lie on the back of her neck. His other arm wrapped around her bringing her so close that the space between them was closed.

When they pulled away she looked up into his eyes and kissed him one more time, "Bye." She said as she made her way back to the door. Jess stood there again watching her go and wishing she would turn around again.


End file.
